April is half over you guys. Time for our virtual coffee date, right? So far April has been busy and I am feeling a bit anxious overall. Not sure why this is but I have really weird dreams where strong emotions wake me. Also I feel like I am hustling but don’t really get ahead. Anyways, here are some more insights while I am sipping my cardamom coffee. (something the main characters in the quantum curators books are constantly drinking…)
If you and I had coffee…
…I start with telling you we have new outdoor furniture. Already. It was a goal of April to get some and it has been delivered on April 8th already. Of course it’s not flawless and we had to claim a replacement but it’s only a bench and the rest is fine so we are already using it. I am sitting on it typing this. It’s a bit chilly so I wear a scarves and a blanket and my fingers start to freeze but I am making the most of it and use it. We decided to not spend very much money on it (those lounges are so so expensive) but it might have already been not the smartest choice. The husband has a saying: buying cheap, buying twice. He might be correct… I was so so fixated on buying some young where the upholstery is somehow fixed so the cushions don’t slide around. I’ve eliminated a tone of those lounges. Well, take a guess. When we found this one we liked it and I suddenly forgot to check that. So here we are, brand new lounge, looks great but the cushions are moving around. So if you have any idea on how to fix them let’s hear it. My current thought is using velcro. I can tape that to the metal but I am not sure the tape will hold on the cushion. But then IKEA does have those for fabric. Should I try or Will I be left with glue stains? I know I could also sew in some ribbons but I am not sure I want to tie 6 cushions every time I move them inside at night and then retie in the morning…
If you and I had coffee…
…I have to mentioned that there is screaming neighbor child. They live directly below us and the kids room seems to be under my office. That boy (pre-school, home all day) seems to have no manners at all. They have a girl which you do not hear at all. Almost like she doesn’t exist. Very cute and nice little girl. But that boy… Some weeks back I was going to bed around midnight and he was running around screaming. And I mean screaming like there is no tomorrow. At four am I woke up to him. again screaming like crazy. I know as parents you are probably also exhausted and maybe even annoyed but I am wondering if this isn’t also part of raising him. This wasn’t a one time thing. They are always up very late for that age. I know I am not the only one in the house hearing him and being a bit put off. They are not speaking any German and it seems like in the house we are the only ones able to do explain more elaborate things so I am pretty sure no one will be able to say much. And I am not sure if I should. he may have some behavioral issues… They may raise him like that to express himself… very tricky. Readers with kids feel free to give advice from your point of view.
If you and I had coffee…
…I tell you about the deep dive AI I am currently doing. The topic of AI is here to stay. I understood that much. I am not particularly interested and can’t really find much enthusiasm about it. However I also know I will need it I want to continue my freelancing and marketing consultant as it seems marketing is the entry point for using AI in business. Everyone can have AI wrote text, blog posts, newsletters and create the images using AI technology. Sigh… so if I want to get any projects it seems like I need to learn how to use these tools and implement them. Knowing myself well enough I decided to join a group of woman who do deep dives to certain topics. It is originally an English learning group and I never saw any added value for me going as I believe my English is rather good. However when they decided on doing the AI deep dive I sighed up (it does cost money) just to have some kick in the ass to get into the topic and have some sparring partners. They are also mainly in the writing and marketing industry. I’ve been listening to a ton of podcasts. I am working through a very scientific book to understand the technology. I have tried about 5 different tools so far. And as I mentioned above came to the understanding that it’s going to stay. Experts say it has about the same impact as the internet had. It is going to be a tool everyone will use eventually and it’s just a matter of time. So to adopt early is a good idea. Here I am trying. Anyone else already deep into this? Any good tools you tested? Any suggestions, thoughts, fears? I am all ears for shared experiences.
If you and I had coffee…
…I admit that I put myself on a book buying ban. I am currently having 87 unread books on my shelf. I am not admitting the number for ebooks. And I will not be able to read all those this year. And there are so many more at my parents shelves I can just borrow. That said, there is a book flea market at the library later this month and I really want to go. Last year I went and gave myself a budget of 5€ (each book is 1€) and I came back with one book that ended up being the favorite of the year. Should I allow myself this one exception? I could also snatch up some older books for more black-out poetry. Please help (read give permission!). Anyone else on a book buying ban? Anyone having experiences with this? What do I do with book club books that I cannot get from the library?
If you and I had coffee…
…I share that my dad had his second surgery on Friday and all went well. Unfortunately he learned that in six weeks he needs yet another one. Which will overall make him unable to move for 18 weeks. He was very depressed and sad when he learned that and I am feeling so sorry for him. He is not a person who can sit idle. He needs to move, go out, meet people. He is withering if he doesn’t have that. I’ve been spending Wednesday with him throughout the last five weeks I think. And I will try to continue even though it robs me of a complete work day. Good thing I am unemployed and don’t find any good projects. Maybe it is meant to be? It is a phase in life I need to be here for my dad and entertain him. I also enjoy these days as we talk and have different conversations because we are just the two of us and we have such long times to really chat. It is a gift. And yet I feel like my todo lis grows longer, I can’t really focus on finding new projects… maybe that is the main root for my anxiousness and weird dreams lately….
If you and I had coffee…
…I share that I am in charge of the April date day and that my original plan for some outdoor activity next weekend may be derailed to do continues rain. So now I have to come up with something else that will probably cost money. I had planned to do a budget friendly thing. I guess not. I have an idea for a museum we could go visit. One we have always talked about. But I am not sure. Maybe we just go for breakfast? Any budget friendly indoor ideas anyone? No move night at home… we do that all other three weekends.
If you and I had coffee…
…I proudly tell you that I managed to clean the entire terrace. It only took three days. Our terrace had a green mossy sheen after the winter. I used our old broken steam cleaner and by the end the brush had no more bristles. It feels so good to get out now. This past weekend I finally gleaned up my terrace garden, planted the hollyhock and a my sorrel and put some seeds (spinach, radishes, basil, parsley, marigolds) into the ground. Fingers crossed they will feel happy in their places and produce nice meals to come.
If you and I had coffee…
…I share with you my image from the office window. Isn’t it amazing what happened in the last four weeks. Actually just the past week. I think all the greenery and leaves came out in the past few days. It is such a miracle.
And just like this our virtual Coffee Date April is over. Time to get back to the hustle and chores of every day life.
What would you tell me if we had coffee? What kind of coffee would you order? What is growing in your garden? Any AI thoughts? Do you have advice regarding the screaming kids? Ideas for the date day?
16 comments
Wow. You have so much going on, Tobia. I’m so sorry your father has to have ANOTHER surgery. That must be so discouraging, but I’m sure you’re a big encouragement to him <3
I have no advice for how to deal with the loud neighbour, but it sounds AWFUL. There can be so much going on behind-the-scenes for a child to behave like that, but it doesn't make it any easier to bear. Hoping it gets resolved quickly <3
And what a gorgeous terrace!!!!
Thank you Elisabeth. Yes it’s a lot right now. I am very sorry for dad to have another one. But it is what it is and let’s hope it all has the desired result.
Unfortunately I do not think that kid will tire out of screaming. Maybe once he is in school but I fear that takes a couple more years. We’ll see.
I’m hoping your father’s surgery goes well. Thoughts for you and your family.
I always think when one kid is well-behaved and the other isn’t, it’s probably not a parenting issue. It’s probably a kid issue. Maybe he’s neurotypical or has other health issues. I guess that doesn’t help you with noise in the middle of the night, but I always try to be sympathetic to parents.
I don’t buy books, so I’m no help. It’s easy for me because our public library is so amazing, but if you don’t have solid library access, I say buy as many books as you want!!
I would agree with you on the kid assessment but somehow I feel like that boy is allowed much more than the girl. I try to be sympathetic though but with some kids it’s tough.
I think we have amazing libraries and I would t want to miss mine. I am just lazy going there and unfortunately they don’t have a huge selection of English books and I like to read those. But I need to go there more often. Not that I need more reading material with my 87 unread books on my shelves.
That screaming kid must be so frustrating for you, but from a mum’s perspective, I encourage you to please have grace and understanding. You don’t know if there are other things going on, like behavioural disorders or autism. Especially if you say their other kid is completely different. My eldest son has autism and, while he doesn’t sound as bad as the kid you’ve described, we’ve definitely had our moments of him screaming so loud the neighbours could hear! The parents may be feeling embarrassed or overwhelmed so maybe reaching out to them could be good. But I know it must be so hard to deal with, so I hope he can settle down a bit soon.
I hope everything goes well with your dad’s health. And I hope you are able to look after yourself while you are caring for him. A fun idea for a cheap indoor date we did once was an indoor picnic. Get some fun picnic food and spread your picnic rug on your living room floor! I wonder if that would work for you?
Lovely to have coffee with you again, Tobia!
Thank you Bella for your insight. I am sorry to hear that your older son has a hard time and I am sure it can be very exhausting for you as a parent to not be able to understand or help or just watch. Currently he is a bit quieter so maybe there are episodes. It may be my bias but I had the feeling he as a male is allowed more as the girl. But I am doubting myself that is way I wanted some input. I don’t see or meet them much as we have very different schedules and have not been able to chat and get to know them. Maybe there will be a chance now that it gets warmer and people are more outside.
I am very glad I can be there for my dad during these long weeks but I would be lying if I said it’s not also at times exhausting. But I am looking forward to our next day on Wednesday.
Today the husband and I have our next date night. I love your indoor picnic idea but do not think something the husband would enjoy much. He would want to turn on the tv.
The screaming child sounds awful!! I’m sorry you’re having to deal with that. I don’t know what to suggest except noise-cancelling headphones. It seems terrible that everyone in the building has to suffer because of one child. I’m sorry to hear about your dad needing another surgery. Maybe it is fate that you’re able to be there for him. Sending you my best wishes.
Your terrace looks so beautiful!
I was thinking this too. Maybe it’s godsend that I have the time to take care of dad. It’s much appreciated. I know there will be other phases again.
I love my terrace. I may write a separate blog post.
Currently the child is a bit quieter so fingers crossed it’s just a phase… maybe? Please?
I work on the content team for a digital marketing agency, and we are ALL IN on AI. We mainly use ChatGPT at this point, and many of our writers use it to write the majority of their pages (although we always edit and make sure things sound okay!). I love the way I can ask ChatGPT anything, especially when my creativity is low. I’ve also asked ChatGPT to help with my podcast outlines, give me questions I can ask my team in our Slack chat, etc. It’s so useful and definitely something you need to be familiar with if you’re working in marketing these days.
I totally agree. There is no way around chatGPT these days. I’ve used it for brainstorming and post writing and even for finding producers of certain products but that wasn’t too successful. Do you also use other tools? Midjourney? I’ve used one a podcast host recommended for cleaning up sound and it was mind blowing how quickly I’d got rid of issues.
Unfortunately, I’m off coffee because of migraines, so I would probably have herbal tea if I were to have a hot drink. I’m so sorry to hear that your dad needs another surgery, that is tough. It is good that you have a bit of time to spend with him and make it a bit easier. And a screaming kid would be so annoying. I don’t have any suggestions, unfortunately.
Congratulations on your new outdoor furniture and your clean patio. It looks huge. For the cushions, instead of ribbons, sew on some velcro ties, which still need to be done up but would be easier than ribbons.
That is a great suggestion with the Velcro ties. I’ll keep it in mind. Right now we are testing it as is and see how much it really bothers.
Yes it’s good I am able to spend time with my dad. He’s a bit down as recovering will take so long.
I think I’d rather forgo coffee than cake and pastries.
Wow, such a huge terrace! I love it. I can see why you wanted to get furniture and get out there :)
I am sorry to hear that your dad has to have more surgery, but I really love that you’ve been able to spend so much time with him. I am sure he appreciates it and you’ll always look back at this as time well spent!
I have mixed feelings about AI… I should definitely learn more about it and understand how to use it but have chosen to stay ignorant so far. It doesn’t intrigue me.
I feel you on the AI thing. It doesn’t intrigue me either but I know if I don’t get some knowledge it will be tough in future projects. I’ve already seen it in job openings that and what specific AI knowledge is required.
It’s definitely a huge plus to be able to spend time with my dad. And I know he appreciates it a lot. He is just also a bit frustrated because it’s such a long time he immobilized.
A few thoughts. Thank you for the updates- very nice to have coffee with you!
AI- I have refused AI for the longest time but then bit the bullet. I got Gemini Chat from Google and have used it for lessons, activities, even games for my class. Also, itineraries! I asked for Paris activities and boom!
Kid- that is frustrating, especially if you are on the receiving end. Agree with the commenter above- sounds like BA or autism spectrum.
Dad – hugs to him! I missed it- do you have siblings?
Outdoor furniture – ours never went into the garage and just sat outside all winter long.. Ooops. Oh well, we wiped it down.
Thanks for you update and your input Daria.
Haha our outdoor furniture will not be inside either and we only have space for some of the cushions so washing and wiping it will be.
Your are well in the AI game and have done some fun stuff. I need to use it more and feel like once the income is stable again I’ll be subscribing to chat gpt.
I do have siblings- two younger sisters.
Seems like the consensus is that the boy downstairs has some sort of issue. I guess there is not much I can do about it.